This Letter arrived on sep 20th 2007 in my virtual estate in Hamburg.
To The Most Perfect Soul Creditor, Goddess Natalia
Dear Goddess...
The sun is up and I myself alone again....course, nothing new on that...I maintained myself here at one place alone many years now...judging timely, decades are talking here, my immaculate Goddess... Surely this letter has it own lack of common sense knowing how it will never be seen by those thundering eyes of yours..I decided anyways to go for it, cause at this weak and most unprotected stage of my life , what else to admit accept how your tremendous website, so dearly and firmly replanished my inner self, that is by all the words , so hard to describe...
The fact that I stayed alone for so long, won't budge much anyone, less myself , Dear Goddess... I am eightyone and most of them that I knew are long gone from this messy place...The Husband that I had left high heaven twentytwo years ago... I have a daughter and supposedly even a grandaughter of some sort...I don't see anyone and almost not eager to meet none of them again...They live in Michigan which is way far away from Arizona where I am located....So look at me..wasting your time even if you for some strange occasion get to know this letter of mine, so I am terribly sorry , so terribly sorry..and please dismiss all my correspodance this very instant, will ya....
I don't see, my Goddess...I am classified as a blind persona and most of them birds that fly, yes I hear of them...and if you ask me, what else..that is all..when I was sixtyone my diabetes skyrocketed and quickly burned my eye nerve... And I can tell you how funny is not to see again...now, for some issues that are a nerve-wracking constanta upon this blackened world, trust me, not much to miss...How I told you that the sun is up, remember that....( first sentence )...now, that is the missing of a major kind, no doubt about that... I used to read Brodsky and I used to travel all the way to Solveng and right to Las Cruces...please do that ( second) trip first time you get a chance...You will be fascinated by El Paso... The finest characters of my country come from El Paso...Even finer onces accross the Zaragoza bridge, but that is a metter for another gig thou still certainly thrilling...Curse me now, but I dearly recollect in my almost well-gone memory how I would be sitting somewhere by the road, think it might me Lordsburg of New Maxico, sure it is.... and words and very much turbulent stanzans would be pouring out of my most mrigid dialect...it was about:...And the Endless sky over the tiles,grows bluer as swelling birdsong fills. And the clearer the song is heard, the smaller the bird...
Oh ..well. you gathered by now how those were days when I was still able to see, Dear Goddess..but vision is nothing but a cheap knockoff of reality... How darkness expended for years and years there afterwards, sole images came back thou... How 's that?...Plain answers, my Mighty Creditor, nothing but plain answers...
Now, let me recollect this time how that was a somewhere probably mid of last year when I was left to dream all over alone...My Polish native helper left the house quarter till eleven at night..She used my desktop for some reason constantly, although I never objected...
Let me varify that the sun is up and sure it is....
Did you hear and sure you probably did how germs come back from the space more deadlier that what they are prior to the lifting...Did you hear how experts found out how lonely people are more likely to get sick and die younger...they even used a "gene chip" to look at the different sort of an abandoned human specimen...and there was nothing yet dicovered to solve sorrow , I can tell you that much from my prospective, Dearest Authority..
what's down the drain is down the tubes, just as same.. James Lovelock and a mighty Gaia hypotesis how the planet is a living entity...hundered to twohundred meter long pipes so you can solve the home...wave motion pumps up the water ...such an action can easily fertilizes algae and bring them up to the surface... Did you know how algal bloom presses down carbon dioxide and generates thing called dimenthyl sulphide...hah?...bababoom....it does what...easy and simple, help to bring the sunlight down to us......and , even easier, my Goddess, even easier to figure out how for myself this sort of light was long time over... I told you...it just burned down my nerve...Unless for some rare few things...For the seed of my body and for the reflex of my feelings... The seed I projected in my rarely- ever-more tense brain...the projection about the seed that I carried once...And for this most excellent carry of all , this lonely woman will never remain as lonely again...
The seed was a model and an actress by the age of eighteen...she made movie and tv appearances...she was in reports...she is multiply heavily pierced at nipples , labia and tongue...Body totally hairless, head too... seventh surgery in 2006 gave her ( still in accordance to her immaculate body) cup H...and in my stage or shape, most definitely I prefer the title of a unique Doctoress, one of many name varieties that she go by...
so I am seeing in blindness... so it is good, even the hours are late ( now, how much time do I have left, my my, that no one knows )..
Truly Yours...
Philis Baker
Scottsdale, AZ
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